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11 years and ending... A lesson learnt...

The moments on court,
I was ready for all.
Giving my very best,
I stood to the test.

Little did I know 11 years passed,
something I can't understand.
I braved it all,
picking up when I fall.

They looked me in the eyes with hate,
they shot me behind my back.
Blood of friendships flowed,
from the aching wounds of my soul.

I thought I trusted them,
but I feel my instincts go.
They weren't made out what I made them out to be,
Help me, I don't know.

Nevertheless, few passed by in my life,
knowing I was never always right.
Forgiveness was all I asked for,
and forgiveness they gave.
Understanding I thirst for,
more understanding came.

To them a thousands thanks I give,
for you are the reason I lead.
Support you gave me,
and spark the passionate fuel I burn.

Eleven years in my life,
never have I seen such failure.
Eleven years in my life,
never have I seen such selfishness.
Eleven years in my life,
never have I seen such mindlessness.

Hard as it seems,
it came.
Cold as it seems,
it hurts.
A thorn in the flesh,
that always stings,
I choose to shun it,
just to find peace.

Mistakes I made,
anger I vented.
Fustrations I expressed,
lonliness I felt.
All these has come to pass.
ONE HAS TO REALISE HIS MISTAKE!
ONE HAS TO BE HUMBLE!
ONE HAS TO BE LAST TO BE FIRST,
BECAUSE I WAS CALLED TO SERVE.

Give me time, give me space.
Give me understanding, give me grace.
If only you were in my shoes,
would you know it is not easy
to be me.

TO BE ME...

11 years have come to pass. Eleven years it will end. I will be the silent player, that passed by the game. No one knows, no one cares, for mindless commitments I have shed. Fame is not what I asked for, glory is not what I seek. Only foolishness seeks such things, YES YOU THE FOOLISH ONE. Shaken? Feel guilty... No. Not you. IT'S YOU! OVERFLOWING WITH GUILT!

11 years of my life crippled my soul.
What used to be my friend now becomes my foe.
Never mind, I am just the little boy who spent 11 years of his youth,
learning the ugliness of 'brotherhood'.

A lesson learnt.




The court I soon leave... Tears I shall shed...

A Walk Back To The Starting Point?

Well, it has been a couple of days since orientation ended. The J1s definitly have their fair share of fun and laughter. It really reminds me of the time I spent at my own orientation...

My junior class was very high. Yah, they are an energetic bunch of people that seems to have a power plant attached to their backs. What left me most in awe is their cheers revolving around Spongebob Squarepants and Bob the Builder. Haha... They could actually make a cheer out of it! I am impressed. It was no link... haha

But anyway, this thought struck me. I love both cartoons! In fact, Spongebob is one cartoon I can't afford to miss during the December holidays. I especially like Patrick the dumb starfish and I believe many people do too. It is really weird that adults and grown ups would be so hooked up to these characters and find laughter in it. I sometime love to tune in to sesame street. It brings back my old memories.

In this world of complications and fast changing trends, are the things we are searching for plain and simple? Are the things we are searching for defy logic? Are we looking some things that are no longer logic based because we are tired of the chaos in our lives? Do you ever realise that as people tend to grow older, they somehow revert back to their old childish self? I do...

I thus come up with a conclusion. We all want to search for the truth. We are taught to search for the 'truth'. But at the end of the day, what we long for are things that are simple and plain. Things that can turn on our tickling bones, just like the dumb pink starfish in Spongebob Squarepants. Random jokes or behaviour that defies logic tickles us.

These things seems to bring us back to the days of our childhood, where everything seems so simple. Why are we treading through this circle of chaos, only to find that the purity of children and simplicity is what we long for?

To me, these laughters are like mocking laughters to myself. I laugh at Spongebob Squarepants and his starfish friend, only to realise that I am dumb enough to watch it. I actually laugh at the thought that I am enjoying such simplicity that defies logic.

What is logic... I don't know...

Thank You Jun Yu!

Haha.. If you all notice, I have music on my blog!! Well, all thanks to Jun Yu! ( and God too!)

Was chatting to him and he taught me how to put music on my blog. But I realized I don't have web hosting, so he willingly offered me to use his account. How nice of him lah! Haha... Good to have this kind of juniors. Aiyah... all my juniors are good. But now he can blackmail me le... Haha

Well, the song is called Testify to Love. Don't really know who sang it. My church friend sent it to me. Really nice song. Haha.. Jun yu gave me his professional tips on how to select a blog song. Well, he says some pple won't continue to listen. So, haha, listen the whole song if you want to! Haha, kidding. But it is a nice song lah. Other than a Christian point of view, it is nice from a musician point of view. Haha

OK! Hope all of you a merry CHRISTMAS!!!!!!! Jia you and God Bless YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God

You asked me if God existed
I said yes

You asked me if God love me
I said yes

You asked me if God is beautiful
I said yes

You asked me if God is full of grace
I said yes

You asked me if God is fabulous
I said yes

You asked me if God is faithful
I said yes

You asked me if God is saving
I said yes

You asked me if God is omnipotent
I said yes

You asked me if God is Holy
I said yes

You asked me if God is wonderful
I said yes

You asked me if God is amazing
I said yes

You asked me if God is forgiving
I said yes

You asked me if God is merciful
I said yes

You asked me if God is loving
I said yes

You asked me if God is wise
I said yes

You asked me how does God look like
I answered, "I've barely described Him. He is indescribable......."